Horoscope Review: $1.95 Psychic Reading at Psychic Power Network

The scariest part of phoning a psychic hotline is giving up all the information the clerk wants before she hands you off to the psychic. At Psychic Power Network a foreign-born clerk had to echo and repeat every letter and numeral I gave her. "'S' as in snake," I said. "'F' as in Frank,' she said. "No," I said, more boldly, "'S as in snake. S as in serpent. S as in Superman." I gave her all the info she asked for except my email. I was only taking up their introductory offer of a 10-minute psychic reading for $1.95. To my surprise I received exactly that.

My assigned psychic was "Divine Visionary," an American male who talked a mile a minute. He promptly said, "I always have to remind people I do this very fast-paced, very unconventional--everything from a spiritual perspective." I took this to mean that he did not use Tarot cards and he talked so fast I am sure he did not. He asked how I was and I said fine. Then he said what I bet he says to everyone: "You seem like a very creative inventive person, a great imagination, very vibrant. How can I personally help?"

I had a relationship question. Divine Visionary asked who my friend was, and when I last saw the guy, and the most memorable thing he said when we last met. This is a clever and common set-up to draw out information that can be spun into a "psychic reading," and I don't really believe in "psychic readings," but for $1.95 I could let believers know if they might expect intelligent treatment and service from Psychic Power Network. So I played no games and told Divine the truth.

"I know that he is beginning to home in on his sights on you," said Divine. "I believe that his energy and his focus is being fine-tuned in your direction. I see that he looks upon you as a marvel, as an amazement. He’s mesmerized by you, and each and every day it's growing stronger and stronger."

I told Divine about possible interference in this wonderful picture. Yes, Divine said. A woman from his past is lonely now and wants him back. Divine suggested this woman was unbalanced and asked if I thought so. I said no. Divine corrected himself, saying she was probably like most of us, a little unbalanced when it came to love, or, in her case, obsession. But my friend could handle her diplomatically, said Divine, and "She will be looking elsewhere before the end of the year. His loyalty will ultimately lie with you, I assure you. Mark my words."

Well, golly! Now I won't sweat while she's staying with him for a week! Of course I could have questioned my friend directly about this, but I'm devious and insecure so I called a psychic instead. Ultimately Divine Visionary was totally wrong. But his reading was glib and positive and I was entertained. All psychic networks including this one admit that readings are for entertainment only. If you'll trade tons of personal information and $1.95 to get 10 minutes of fun (or 99 cents for five minutes), I recommend this special offer. Their normal charge is $1.99 a minute.

Sylvia Sky, experienced astrologer, reviews online horoscope and psychic sites for quality and accuracy. See her review of California Psychics. Copyright 2011 by Sylvia Sky.